I Gained It All Back

I'M TOTALLY KIDDING!!!!!!!!!!!!  LOL

How else was I going to get everyone's attention after being away for so long?? 

I'm actually the same weight as I was the last time I talked to you, or right around there.  I stepped on the scale this morning and I'm 238 lbs.  So I've been  hovering right around 240 for months on end.  I know that sounds horrible....but I'm actually a little relieved.  You see, I got laid off from the part-time insurance job a couple of months ago and I was sure I was going to balloon from stress, depression, etc.....but it hasn't happened.  Instead I've been concentrating on Ebay.  In fact, instead of just doing auctions, I bought a store.  And then I bought a SECOND store!! 

So now I'm running 2 stores and making twice as much as I was at the insurance place....Woo Hoo!!  On the downside, I have ONLY been concentrating on Ebay and haven't given weight loss a single thought, which is why I'm still 240. 

And speaking of depressing stuff....I'm turning 40 years old this week.  The horror!!  I've been stressed out about this for about 361 days, lol.  I've truly been dreading it my entire 39th year.  I have no idea why....it's probably no big deal.  I guess I just really loved my 30's and I'm gonna' miss them.  :)

Thanks to Biz for stopping by my blog a couple of weeks ago and saying hi!  That's when I realized how long it's been since I posted.  I didn't intentionally drop off the map...I've just had my nose to the grindstone with the Ebay thing.  I treat it like a full-time job as I definitely devote full-time hours to it.

More good news is coming.....Dwayne and I are looking to buy our first house this coming spring!  Soooo excited about that.  After years and years of renting and keeping my decor/treasures to a minimum, I'm really looking forward to settling into a place I can finally call "home" and buying some stuff to put on the walls!  And after all this Ebaying, I will most likely be buying my items from yard sales.  After seeing what people get rid of in these sales for dirt cheap, I can't see myself ever paying retail again.  :)

In case you want to see what I've been up to, here's the links to my 2 stores:

http://stores.ebay.com/Fiddlestix-and-Fancy

http://stores.ebay.com/TJs-Timeless-Treasures

Things are going well but I still have a long way to go to get the sales where I want them.  I belong to an Ebay Underground group and they post new stuff on the forum each day.  The info is invaluable....so much stuff to learn, ways to save in shipping, items to look out for that are hot right now, etc.  Yesterday someone did a post asking how everyone's sales were for July.  Most everyone considers the summer the SLOW months due to weddings, graduations, vacations, etc., but one of the ladies has done really well this month.  Her first week of July she made over $500 in sales, the 2nd week, over $800 and this past week she made over $900!!!!!  Now THAT'S where I want to be!!!  They say things really take off in September when the kids get back in school and the vacations end.  Supposedly it stays busy through January, so we shall see. 

Well I'm off to do some more work....just wanted to pop in say hey to everyone!!  I still get online and read blogs about once a week so I can keep up with everyone.  Drop me a note and let me know how you're doing.  :)  Talk again soon!

Getting Better

Did you know that when selling on ebay, your settings are defauled to letting the buyer change the invoice on an item before they pay???????  Someone on the ebay underground website told me that, so I went in and changed it.  I sold 8 items over the wknd, most on calculated shipping, and everything came out right.  Hallelujah!!! 

I got online and ordered shipping supplies (free) from USPS, and I also scheduled a  pick up for my front door.  I'm finally getting the process streamlined.

Someone asked me on my last post to give my ebay id so you guys can look at my stuff that's up for sell.  I don't know why I didn't think of that before!  It's tort8451.  I don't know if you can just enter that somewhere or not....I don't know anything about the buyer side.  But if you can figure it out then come visit me! :)

Have a FABULOUS Monday everybody.  :)

Death By Shipping

Where have I been??  Completely immersed in learning how to sell on ebay.  How's it going??  I still have a lot to learn.  Am I making decent money??  Not yet...but I'm working on it.  What have I learned so far??  Here's a list:

Well I finally found the form that allows you to do the calculated shipping, so that the buyer can enter their zip code on their end and pay exactly what it would cost to ship to them.  However that's not working out for some reason, and I have no idea why and no idea how to fix it.  Here are 2 examples...

I sold a kid's baseball glove and a Brighton handbag on a "Buy It Now" price this week.  I had entered the dimensions and weight for both in their listings on the calculated shipping form.  But when they paid, one paid $5 for shipping and the other paid $6.  Somehow I knew this wasn't right...it was way too little for a priority mail shipping cost (one lives in CA), so I didn't print the shipping label from home because I knew it would come out postage due.  Instead I drove to the post ofc and had them weigh each thing and tell me how much it would cost to ship.  Each item was $11 to ship.  Grrrrrrrr.

I was just about in tears over this.  I really thought I had it figured out with the calculated shipping form and was feeling a lot less stressed...until this.  Now I'm scared the shipping will be wrong on EVERYTHING and I'll just continue to lose money.  If each item were a high enough profit margin, it wouldn't be that big of  a deal....but most of my things aren't.  I'm still learning what to buy and not to buy at yard sales, based on what's selling for me.  I quite clearly have a lot of learning to do...and I'm feeling completely helpless and screwed on the shipping....I just don't know how to fix it.

I've also learned that I think things are worth a lot more than what people are willing to pay for them.  I had 12 items listed for auction last week and only 2 of them sold.  So I re-listed everything and dropped the price on it all for this week, and so far I've sold 2 items on a Buy It Now price....but don't have a single bid on anything else.  It's Thur and the auction ends Sat.

I'm not sure how long you should keep re-listing things before you say to heck with it and just throw the damn thing in the Goodwill pile.

I have about 50 things total listed this week due to some heavy duty garage saleling last Fri and Sat (including the 12 I re-listed).  Some of them are clothes.  I got an error msg saying I can't list anymore clothes because I've reached my limit in that category???  Something about being a new seller and having limits for 90 days.  WHATEVER.  I'm quickly growing weary of all of ebay's selling rules.  There's a ton of them. 

Someone who commented on one of my posts turned me onto a REALLY cool website called Ebay Underground.  They have a forum where people talk about all kinds of things, give tips, list what they bought at what price and what things are selling for.  I haven't been able to spend a lot of time reading it yet though.  And a lot of them are moms and talking about buying kid's stuff and listing off things that I have no idea what they're talking about, lol.  I need to learn the names of kid's toys/games to be looking for....apparently there's a decent market for that.  Someone mentioned the other day they picked up one of those little Golden Books from years ago, in mint condition, and sold it for $150.  Now that's the kind of deal I'd like to find!!!

I'm trying to get my picture-taking down.  I bought 2 small desk lamps $7.97 ea. at Walmart and a white foamboard for background and set  up a little table with a white cloth, and for whatever reason, some of my pics are still coming out dark.  Dwayne thinks I need a new camera.  The room is all lit up and the item is nice and bright, but when you take the pic, the backlighting comes out sort of cream-colored, not nice and bright.  I don't know what to do there either...if it's the camera or something else.

If anyone has any tips, I'm all ears.  And I stepped on the scale this morning for the first time in a week....237.8.  Have a great day friends.  :)

Selling Clothes?

I've had one person tell me that selling clothes on ebay is worthless.  Then I had another person tell me I should sell all the clothes I've shrunk out of.  I went through my closet last night and I've got about 30 pieces of clothing, tops/blouses and pants, that are in really nice condition....things I wore to work.  Has anyone else out there tried to sell clothes on ebay?  Any opinions on whether I should or shouldn't?  I was thinking if I could get an average of $10 per item, that would be better than giving them away for free to Goodwill (I sent 3 garbage bags full to Goodwill just a month ago and now I'm feeling kind of sick, lol).  I'm curious how many people try to return them due to not fitting right, or whatever.  I have a "returns not accepted" policy on everything I've sold so far.  I'd want to do the same with clothing....I really don't want to fool with returns at all.  So what do you think?  Is it worth it?  Thanks for any tips!
(And my weight is the same as it was a couple of days ago....holding at 238).

Happy Sunday

Good morning everyone :)

The scale says 238.2 this morning...in the middle of a wknd.  I know, right?!?!  Yay.

This past week was really rough with learning the whole e-bay thing.  I lost a lot of money on shipping.  I listed items for sale on every day of the week, so that when the auctions ended, I had to go to the post office and/or UPS store every day of the week to ship stuff.  Duh!! 

I figured some things out though so I think things will be better going forward.  Dwayne ordered me a scale on Amazon yesterday, so I'm not listing another dang thing until it gets here, so I can be MUCH more accurate when I'm listing the shipping.

I will be garage saleing on Sat mornings (we went yesterday, and I LOVE that Dwayne is doing this with me), and listing any/all items for sale on Sundays, so that the auctions all end on a Saturday.  If people pay for their items the same day, then I can go out and ship them the same day, instead of all through the week.

But to streamline things even further, I'm going to study up today online about how to have packages picked up at your front door.  If I print my labels out on ebay, after I have a scale, then I might be able to eliminate the post ofc if scheduling a pick up at my house is free.  I have to read about that today.

My next order of business is to open another checking account that is solely for ebay.  I went to Bank of America yesterday and tried to do this, but the banker talked me right out of it.  He forewarned me that BOA is about to force everyone into 1 of 4 accounts that they will be offering in an effort to collect more on fees (yes, he actually said that to me).  He said all of the accounts have monthly fees, but there are things you can do to have those fees waived...the most basic one being keeping a daily balance of $2,000 in your acct. at all times.  I had to LOL at that one.  I told him that would never happen.  I told him it sounded like it was time to find another bank altogether.  He said eventually there will be no such thing as free checking at ANY bank.  I told him I didn't believe that...that I would be able to find it at a smaller bank.  He agreed that a smaller one might keep offering it.  I said it sounds to me like SMALLER is BETTER.  It was almost noon when I left, so no time to run the roads to find a smaller bank on a Saturday.

Anyhoo, I feel like I want a separate account because PayPal sucks out the shipping every time you mail something (you pay upfront obviously).  And I know that ebay will eventually take out 9% of everything I've sold within a month...I think this happens at the end of the month.  And it just makes me nervous that all of these transactions are going on in the acct where I keep my bill money and have to watch out for checks to clear on bills.  I looked around online yesterday for a smaller bank, and I think I'll be opening a new account at one I found on Monday morning.  I'm trying to get the ebay process as streamlined as possible.

Btw, I refunded the lady her money that bought the Gucci wallet.  What it boiled down to I think is that she had a brown Gucci purse, and wanted a brown wallet to match.  When the wallet got to her, it was just the wrong shade of brown (we've sent several emails over the wknd).  It's not a fake Gucci.  She emailed yesterday to say she shipped it back, so now I have to decide if I want to re-list it.  I guess you can only tell so much from a picture, so I'm a little nervous about it happening again.  The chances of me re-listing it are slim to none.  I only paid 50 cents for it at that yard sale in the ritzy neighborhood where the lady was also selling her Porsche.  So I'm not out much.

I've got a frig full of veggies and need to do some prep today, make some soup, maybe another veggie/pasta salad, etc.  Hope all of you are fully enjoying your weekend. :)

**KatieJ, if your'e reading today, I sent you an email yesterday...write me back!  :)

I Was Waiting For It...

Remember how I said I accidentally listed a fake Kate Spade bag the other day and E-Bay threatened my life?  Well...I half-joked about waiting to hear back from the lady that bought the Gucci wallet saying it was a fake, too.

WELL GUESS WHAT???

I just got that email.  She wants her money back.  She chided me for trying to sell something fake like this on ebay and how she would NEVER do such a thing. 

DEAR.
GOD.

I have lost so much friggin' money this week with the shipping and now the fakes....talk about gunshy.  I'm not sure if I should push on and try to keep learning about stuff...or if I should hang up my auction gloves.

What do you think?

Help me before I go complely broke.....or nuts....whichever comes first.  So damn frustrated.

e-Bay Update

Are you guys tired of hearing about my e-bay stuff yet?  Sorry...I know a couple are interested so I'm going to keep updating for a while. :)

OH...you wanted a weight loss update since this is a weight loss blog???  Fine.  The scale said 240 again this morning.  Oh how I love that #.

Back to ebay.  It turns out, I'm a complete moron.  I really don't have this shipping thing down yet.  I listed a box of 60 DVD's, and ebay would only let me list a max amt. of $3.00 for shipping (I guess they assume you're only shipping ONE dvd???  So I'm like ok, whatever, it can't be THAT much, right??  RIGHT??  WRONG.

Those DVD's sold last night....all 60 of them....to a guy in CALIFORNIA.  Do you know how much it costs to ship to the West Coast when you live on the East Coast????????  Yeah.  THAT MUCH.

$51 for priority mail....$25 for parcel post.  Those babies went parcel post.  God knows when he'll get them, and who knows that kind of nasty feedback he'll leave about me for that. 

I made a beeline for home after my horrifying post ofc trip to UNLIST the paper shredder...made out of CAST IRON that I only had $10 for shipping on.  Someone emailed me about it, suggested I take it to the UPS store and have it weighed.  They said shipping large or awkward items are better shipped through UPS Ground for some reason.  So I went to the UPS store, found out the box it ships in costs $8 and the price to ship it to San Francisco is $27.  So I re-listed it tonight, with a shipping price of $35, thankyouverymuch.  I did put a note in my description box that if the buyer lives much closer to GA, then I'll be happy to adjust the shipping.  Three people have it on their Watch list again.

This learning-as-I-go thing is about to kill me, lol...and my quickly depleting bank acct is not happy AT ALL.  At this rate, I won't have any gas money left to get to work!!  Needless to say, it's been a rough couple of days.

Exasperated, I googled shipping tips for e-bay.  I read a guide that a girl wrote about shipping on ebay, and her very first point of advice is BUY A SCALE.  No shit, dude.  It's definitely on my list of things to do.  She said she bought one at Wal-mart for $22 and it's been well worth it.  She said to print labels through e-bay instead of USPS.  E-bay charges .17 for delivery confirmation, where the post ofc charges .75 or .85. 

I also mis-guessed on how big a small flat rate box was when I listed a book last week.  I was thinking The Hobbit should fit in a small flat rate....surely a small one would hold a book!  NOT!  It had to go into a medium flat rate box today, going from $5 to $12.  (eyeroll).  Now I know the size of all the flat rate boxes...I brought a few home with me today.

As of right now I've made $188 on ebay so far....then you minus ALL THAT SHIPPING, so I've made like $5.  lol  None of the money will be available and sent from PayPal to my bank acct until about 3 days after the buyers actually receive their packages, and somehow report it back to ebay.  Something about that makes me nervous.

Thanks for all the tips Chrissy...I love your input.  Please keep the advice coming!  In answer to your questions, I haven't found something I love, other than I love the prices that designer handbags go for.  But after the fake Kate Spade I listed (having no idea who Kate was at the time), I am now terrified to purchase these bags at garage sales.  I must of just gotten dumb lucky on that Gucci wallet.  Unless, of course, the buyer contacts me in a couple of days and tells me I sold her a fake.  I'm waiting for it!!!!
And no, I haven't heard of that Backroom place.  What kind of place is it exactly?

Learning As I Go

Selling on e-bay is not as easy as it may sound.  I've already screwed up and this was my first weekend garage saleing!

Thanks to Jennifer and Chrissy for the tips.  I truly appreciate your help.  I've spent the last 2 weeks trying to learn how to research things and learn the ins adn outs of selling on ebay.  I went to a garage sale yesterday in a ritzy neighborhood and picked up a Gucci wallet for 50 cents.  I searched the completed listings to see what they were going for, then posted it with a starting price of $29.99.  A couple of hours later a lady emailed me and asked if I'd set it on a "Buy It Now" price for $65 and she'd purchase it immediately.  SOLD!!!  That was fun!!

Today I went to a flea market with Dwayne.  The plan was to look around at different things and then go home and research prices to see what's hot and what's not.  While there, a purse and matching wallet caught me eye.  It had a price of $10 on it and I gave him $7.  I did not know the name brand on it, I was just thinking it was a cute set and I should get $30-35 out of it for both the handbag and wallet.

When I got home and researched it, I found out Kate Spade was a popular name in handbags, and the bags by themselves w/o a wallet were selling for $70 and up!  Since I'd never heard the name, I googled how to tell if a handbag is fake.  I looked at a bunch of labels, read that her bags were made in many places over the years, such as USA, China, Taiwan, etc.  The labels looked real to me, so I listed the set at $60.  About an hour later I got an email from ebay basically threatening my life for trying to sell a FAKE handbag on their site.  I was warned in a page long email, and if I try to do it again, my account will be suspended.  GREAT...not so much fun.  So that has me feeling a little wary and I know to be a LOT more careful about buying things I don't know diddly squat about.

I also purchased the paper cutter that I posted about yesterday.  The lady at the garage sale (same ritzy neighborhood...it was a neighborhood-wide sale) was asking $20.  Dwayne offered $10.  She said she couldn't take less than $15.  I wasn't willing to risk more than $10 on something that I thought looked cool, but wasn't sure if it was really worth anything.  So we started walking back to our car.  The lady yelled out that if we really wanted it we could have it for $10...she was just glad it was going to a "good home", she said.  I had to giggle inside, thinking "Yeah right lady, as soon as I get this baby home it's going up on auction!", lol.  I emailed my friend Kathleen who deals in antiques and she's guessing I can get $30-$40 for it.  I listed it at $29.99, 40 something people have looked at it, and 10 people have it on their "watch list", so I'll let you know what happens when the auction is over.

Dwayne had a collector's edition of The Hobbit that he let me sell, so it was free to me.  It brought $28 this wknd, and I sold some vintage pillow cases for a little (they're really not worth anything, which surprised me).  So I had 3 shipping labels to print out tonight.  We went to Office Depot today and bought labels...and I bought the wrong ones.  I realized I needed full sheet labels AFTER I hit print label on the ebay site, so they sucked $5.15 out of my paypal account, I had to void the label since I didn't have the right kind to print it out on, and I got a message back saying that once the post office verifies that I didn't actually use the label, they'll refund my $5.15 in about 2 weeks.  UGH. 

So yeah...it's been a learning experience to say the least.  Some of it's been aggravating, but overall, I can see where I can make a little money on the side to supplement my income.  I made $100 this wknd.  If I can work my way up to $200 a week, that will be perfect.  I obviously still have a lot of learning to do and will continue to do searches, etc. for a couple of hours each night, so that my garage sale purchases on the wknds get better and better. 

If any of you sell on e-bay and have any tips for me, I'm all ears.  Thanks!!  :)

Ever Seen One of These?

I started garage saleing this weekend to re-sell stuff on e-Bay and see if I can supplement my income.  Dwayne and I purchased this today, but when I do a search on e-Bay, I can't find another one exactly like it.  It's a Victory 24" cast iron & wood paper cutter/butcher's roll that they used to have in old country stores.  Has anyone seen one or know what it might be worth?  Thanks for the help!

Poison

I think there's a lot to what people say about carbs (the bad ones) being poison.  I've really been paying attention to the way I feel after I eat too many carbs these last 2-3 months, and there's a notable difference.  They really do make me feel hazy, foggy, sluggish...overall like crap.  When I'm sticking to mostly protein and veggies w/ fats like EVOO, then I just feel BETTER.  My head/mind seems clearer, I feel lighter, and just less junky.  I hate that junky feeling.

Being someone who's always loved sandwiches, getting away from the bread has really been hard.  I continue to work on it, and take the choices day by day.  Sometimes I fail miserably, but I keep trying.

Yesterday was one to be proud of.  I had an egg scramble with grilled chicken and mushrooms, onions & red bell pepper.  Lunch was the soup I made with chicken and veggies (broccoli, yellow squash, zucchini, onions, datil pepper & 1/2 c. fat-free Half & Half, all pureed with the immersion blender into creamy deliciousness (shredded chicken added in after blended).  I had a snack plate of veggies at work with grape tomatoes, cucumbers, sweet mini peppers and baby carrots.  Dinner was chicken fajitas but I skipped the tortillas.  I ate them over a bed of romaine, spinach, tomatoes, cucumbers, bell peppers and a few sliced black olives (no cheese) with a little sour cream on top and a small amount of dressing by mixing 2 Tbsp  of Ranch and 2 Tbsp of Texas Pete hot sauce. 

I did excellent in the low carb department overall.  My only bad choice was splitting a Little Debbie brownie with Dwayne (1/2 is 130 cals...but pure sugar).  I don't expect any of my days to be perfect...but I do expect to get better.

Breakfast this morning was 2 eggs scrambled with 2 oz. Boar's Head low sodium ham, bell peppers, onions and mushrooms with Texas Pete on top.  I made a salad for lunch with romaine, spinach, red cabbage, red onions, bell peppers, sweet mini peppers, and tomatoes.  My snack plate is celery, cucumbers, grape tomatoes, baby carrots and a 35 cal. wedge of the Laughing Cow chz (for the celery).  The plan for dinner is a 93/7 plain hamburger on the grill (no bun), and a bowl of the chicken/veggie soup.  (Dang I miss my camera!!)

I'm feeling good today...no bloating, no ovary pain, healthy food planned, and the scale says 238.6 again this morning.  Happy Tuesday!!  :)

No Camera!

I left my camera at Mom's yesterday when I went over for Easter dinner so no food pics from yesterday or today.  I'm trying to get mom or my sister to meet me at lunch tmrw to get the camera back...it feels like my arm's been cut off w/o it. 

The scale says 238.6 this morning.  :)  The fact that we had turkey instead of ham yesterday probably saved me from a big sodium hit.  I'm trying like heck to stay under 240 and inch on down the scale. 

Breakfast today was an egg scramble with veggies and grilled chicken...same thing I had yesterday for breakfast.  Lunch is a bowl of the veggie soup w/ chicken that I made a couple of nights ago, and I have a snack bowl of raw veggies for this afternoon.

I laid out some chicken breasts to thaw so I'm thinking I will probably make fajitas for dinner.  Happy Monday!  Only 4.5 days til the weekend!  :)

Brittany and Food Pics

Today was a good day...I really enjoyed it.

Breakfast was only 2 cups of coffee with fat-free Half & Half.

I got to Brittany's restaurant for lunch and to take her the Easter basket around 12:30p.  At this point I was HONGRY!  I've been promising her I was going to try their wings, so I got 6 of them as an appetizer.  I had decided that whatever I got for lunch, it wasn't going to have a bun on it, and it wasn't going to be fried.  I wanted to go as low-carb as possible today.  She suggested the grilled chicken tenders with grilled onions, peppers and mushrooms topped with provolone cheese.  So that's what I got!!  Sooooo delicious.  I ate 4 of them and had to leave 1 on the plate.  I was STUFFED.  And by the way, she LOVED her basket!  She couldn't believe how much yummy stuff I filled it with.  :)

Had to leave one behind....

She didn't like that her hair was messy...I think she looks great no matter what.  :)

After leaving her a nice tip, it was off to the Flea Market.  I'm trying to do some research on what to sell on e-Bay so I took my camera to the flea market, took some pics of things, and went home and looked them up.  I didn't find anything worth selling yet....so bummed.  I'm going to start garage saleing next weekend though and hopefully I'll do ok.

After grocery shopping, I laid down on the sofa at 5:30p and woke up at 7:15p...so HONGRY!!  I told Dwayne to fire up the grill while I rinsed off some chops and chicken and drizzled some House Italian dressing on them for a quick marinade.

While the grill was heating up I threw 3 small chicken breasts in a big pot and added some broccoli, yellow squash, zucchini and onion.  I boiled it on the stove til the chicken was done.  I took the chicken out to shred and will use an immersion blender to puree all the veggies into a creamy soup.  I'll probably add a datil pepper and some FF Half & Half also...then throw back in the shredded chicken.  I'll take pics of the finished product tomorrow...when I'm eating it. :)

While the food was grilling, I made up a snack plate and went outside to sit on the deck with Dwayne and Scarlette.  He ate almost all my carrots and Scarlette ate half of the mozzarella cheese stick!

Dinner was finally ready and I madea  big ol' plate with 2 pork chops (Scarlette got 1/2 of 1 of them), some grilled asparagus, and leftover carrots and mushrooms from last night (I threw the leftover potatoes away so I wouldn't eat them..low carb day!)

Chops and Chicken

The tastiest way to cook asparagus....GRILLED!!  :)

YUM

While I was at the Flea Market I spent $6 on myself....$3 for a Christmas Hurricane lamp and $1 ea. on 3 Christmas soaps.

We're having Easter dinner tomorrow at Mom and Dad's and it will be carb heavy, so I'm going to keep carbs out of the other 2 meals of the day.

Hope you're all having a lovely Easter weekend.  :)

Happy First Easter Brittany!

It was a crappy eating day and I've got (most of) the pics to prove it!

Hit the door at 6:30am this morning headed in to work the morning shift.  Totally forgot to pack a piece of the breakfast casserole and any snacks.  So I hit the Chic-fil-A drive-thru and got a chicken burrito minus the cheese.  I heard they've started selling grilled nuggets now, although I haven't tried them, so I asked the girl at the window if they were going to start offering a grilled chicken burrito for breakfast.  She asked her manager and he said no.  Oh well...I thought it was a good idea, lol.  Sorry, no pic of the burrito.  Use your imagination.  :)

Was supposed to have lunch with Kim today but she had to cancel, so I headed home.  It was nearly 1pm when I was passing the grocery store, almost home, and my stomach was growling.  The burrito was at 7am with no snacks inbetween then and lunch.  I knew I was making a roast for dinner, so I stopped in to pick up some portabello mushrooms to throw in the pan.  I already had the potatoes and carrots at home. 

I knew I didn't have any lunch foods at home because it was the end of the week and time to grocery shop again, so I just grabbed 4 buffalo chicken tenders and a cup of chicken noodle soup for lunch out of the deli.

Yes I know this was a crappy lunch...trust me...the day gets worse.

Having only gotten about 4 hrs. of sleep last night, I crashed on the sofa and didn't wake up until 4:30pm.  Crap!  It takes 3 hours to cook a roast!! 

I threw everything in the pan and we didn't end up eating dinner until about 7:30pm.  The only snack inbetween lunch and dinner was a few grape tomatoes.

I always make rice and gravy with my roast.  I decided not to tonight, because if I make it, I'll eat it, and Lord knows I'd already had enough carbs for the day.  I've loved rice and gravy since childhood and where other people may choose mac 'n' chz or mashed potatoes as their ultimate comfort food....rice and gravy is mine.

So...Dwayne comes home from work and tells me that Mark is coming over.  He's a friend of ours that is originally from Baltimore, and will be moving back there soon, so Dwayne invited him over for dinner.  He gets here and I tell him we're having roast for dinner.  He says "Damn!  I can't have any...it's Passover!"  Can't eat meat.  So now all I have for him is veggies for dinner.  Here comes the rice and gravy....and biscuits.

And you know I ate it.  Although Scarlette had her fair share from my plate.

I'm not done.

It finally dawned on me that this is the first year I'd be able to make an Easter basket for Brittany!!  Having never had anymore children since I gave Brittany up for adoption, I've never had the happy experience of filling an Easter basket.  I've made them for other people's less fortunate children before, but not for someone as close to me as her.  I told Dwayne what I wanted to do, and he gave me the money to go get the stuff.

I got everything at Walgreen's.  This basket has white eyelet material around the top of the outside and the pink gingham fills me with glee.  :)

$30 worth of candy....this was just too much fun!!

One thing really disturbed me.  I specifically wanted to give her a chocolate cross instead of a chocolate bunny and I know Russell Stover sells them.  They didn't have any and I searched high and low.  I asked the incredibly disinterested cashier and she told me she had no idea what I was talking about.  I told her that Russell Stover makes them along with the bunnies to give you a religious option.  I said as cute and fun as the bunnies and chicks are, it really is all about the Resurrection.  She sarcastically sniped, "....and yet they still seem to sell it", with a disgusted look on her face.  She may have been an atheist, lol.  And as far as her not so subtle innuendo about the commercialization of the religious side of the holiday by selling the choclolate crosses, my only response to that is "Touche".

I had a small bowl of candy leftover...some mini Reese's eggs, Butterfinger eggs, Cadbury mini eggs (Mark calls them raptor eggs...as in Jurassic Park, lol)...and some jelly beans.  The REAL Brach's ORIGINAL jelly beans.  Mark's brother Kevin showed up and all 3 of the guys have been munching down on the leftover candy...thank goodness.  I will admit to 2 chocolate mini eggs and about 10 jelly beans.  The bowl should be empty by the time the guys go home tonight. 

I've got a good day planned for tomorrow....breakfast casserole will start the day.  Then I'm going to do my grocery shopping, and I'm going to try to make 1 or 2 new recipes this week so I'll have some different food pics to post.  I'll do this until I get completely bored with it.  Then I'm going to the restaurant where Brittany works to have lunch and talk with her for a few mins, and give her the Easter basket.  She knows I'm coming but the basket is a surprise...I'm so excited!!  Definitely taking some pics. 

After lunch I'm heading up the highway to check out a flea market and make a list of things I see.  I want to come back home and look them up on e-Bay to see if I can get a feel for what's selling and what's not, and for how much. 

I'm not certain on dinner plans yet, but I imagine since the weather is supposed to be gorgeous we'll be grilling out.  I LOVE grilled food...will probably be chicken or pork chops and some veggies of some sort.

I'll be back tomorrow night with pics and another post.  Hope you have a GREAT Saturday!!  :)

e-Bay and Thai food

Let's start with today's food pics, and then we'll get to the E-bay question. :)

I finally got to try the breakfast casserole and I'll tell you the truth...I didn't love it.  What was missing?  The grease.  I skipped the step of sauteeing the sweet potatoes (and there was supposed to be onions) in the grease left over from cooking your sausage.  First of all, I used the bagged turkey sausage crumbles so there was no grease, and therefore, no flavor, lol.  I didn't hate it mind you...it was just kind of bland.  I've got 5 pieces left and won't be wasting it though, so it's all good.

Lunch was some turkey breast that I cooked last night and some more pasta salad...I made a HUGE bowl of this stuff on Sunday.

This is what I've been snacking on at work instead of the big ass box of donuts in the breakroom...thankyouverymuch!

Here's the turkey breast I roasted in the oven last night....

I took the easy way out and made turkey sandwiches for dinner.  Mine is on sourdough bread with thick tomato slices, sweet onions, dill pickles and a swipe of lite mayo.  I ate less than half of that pasta salad because the sandwich was ginormous!

I'm done eating for the night and sipping on some decaf coffee w/ fat-free half  & half right now.

I'm thinking of buying and re-selling items to make some extra cash until Errand Fairy brings me some more business.  My idea is to pick up stuff for dirt cheap at yard sales/garage sales and re-sell it on e-Bay.

Are any of you selling stuff on e-Bay?  I'm looking for some tips.  I've been trying to do searches for things to see what kind of prices they're bringing, but it's just too broad.  They sell EVERYTHING on there, so I haven't really been able to hone in on specific items that I should be looking for.  Any ideas or tips would be greatly appreciated.  Thanks!

Tomorrow I have to work from 8a-12p...we're only working a 1/2 day for Good Friday.  Then I'm going to meet my friend Kim for lunch whom I haven't seen in at least 2-3 months.  We're going to a Thai place close to my work.  I've only had Thai food once and it was quite a while ago.  I have no idea what's on the menu and less of an idea of what tastes good.  Any Thai food lovers??  I need some lunch suggestions! :)

Paleo Sweet Potato & Sausage Casserole

I always get tired of taking food pics after awhile, but I'm having fun for now.  :)  Oh and by the way, I got on the scale this morning and it said 239.0.  Maybe there's hope after all.

I had Biz's breakfast sammies again this morning.

Then I got busy making the casserole originally found on Helen's blog at Doing a 180, but I found it again on Biz's blog at Biggest Diabetic Loser.

I can't ever seem to follow a recipe exactly and this was no exception.  Biz used 1/2 lb. of sausage, and Helen used 1 lb. if I remember correctly.  I took the easy way out and used a 9.6 oz. bag of Jimmy Dean turkey sausage crumbles.  You're supposed to cook the sweet potatoes (I used 1 large one) in the microwave for 4 mins.  I cooked mine 5 mins. because the next step is to sautee the sweet potatoes for a few mins in a skillet and I didn't have time for that.  I chopped up a bunch of spinach (I never measure veggies) and threw it all in a bowl.

I sprayed my baking dish with Pam, poured it in, and then added my eggs.  I used 5 whole eggs and 4 egg whites.  It didn't cover the mixture, so I probably needed more, but that's all the eggs I had.  I put 1/2 c. of 2% Mexican blend cheese on top, and then added some thin sliced sweet pepper rings because Biz did and it looked good.

I baked it at 375 for 25 mins and the eggs weren't quite set, so put it back in the oven for another 10 mins....so 35 mins. cooking time for mine.

I cut it into 6 squares.  How does it taste?  I have absolutely no idea.  I had already eaten breakfast and it was time to get to work, so I'll be having it for breakfast tomorrow.  :)

Lunch was leftovers from last night.  Grilled chicken and Crunchy Veggie Pasta Salad.

I packed this veggie bowl for snacks.  I threw in a Laughin Cow chipotle something or other cheese thingy to put on the celery.  I don't do plain celery.

When it was time to break out the veggies at work, I put it all on a plate and added some grape tomatoes and 8 raw almonds...snacks that I already had at work.  It took me about an hour and a half to graze on all of this goodness.

When the craving for something salty hit, I broke out the evil carbs....crackers.  I fell in love with these about 3 years ago.  They are the crispiest, crunchiest cracker I've found.  They are 10 cals each and worth every one.  I had 7 of them.

I made chicken fajitas for dinner.  I took a pic of the tortillas I normally use, which are 40 cals. each.  But since I already had carbs with the breakfast sammies and crackers, I decided to put mine on green leaf lettuce.  I added some sauteed red onion and red bell pepper (cooked in Pam) and some sour cream on top.  These were fantastic!

I made Dwayne's fajitas with these.

HOLY YUM!

I baked a turkey breast tonight after dinner so I'd have it ready when we got home from work tomorrow.  Bad idea.  My house now smells like Thanksgiving.  I ate about 6 oz. of that while taking it off the bone.  Doh!  I'll post a pic of it tomorrow. 

Hope you had a tasty day!  :)

Crunchy Veggie Pasta Salad

Hi!  Let's get the weight loss, or lack of, out of the way first so we can get to the food pics.  I'm still at 240 and have been here for a month. 

We went to Helen this past weekend.  I got on the scale Sat. morning before we left and was 238.  Then went out of town and ate restaurant food for 2 days...hello sodium!!  I got back on the scale Monday morning and was back at 240.  I'm assuming it was the same this morning...I don't know...I'm really tired of looking.  Thinking about giving my scale a 2 week vacation.

Helen is a little town in North Georgia made to resemble a German town.  Here are a few pics of the shops, etc.:

Ok, so you get the idea.  It was a relaxing weekend.

I was thinking today that I need to get some more fresh veggies in so I looked around on some blogs.  I found a Creamy Dill Macaroni Salad on Danica's blog...listed on my sidebar.  She's listed on my sidebar.  I intended to follow her recipe exactly but ended up making some changes...basically just added more veggies and a little less pasta.  It is absolutely delicious!  I also tried out Biz's breakfast sammies this morning that I keep seeing on her blog.  I used a 100 cal Thomas english muffin split in half w/ some Boar's Head low sodium ham, fresh spinach, 2 eggs and some thick slices of tomato.  So, so good!  Here's some pics:

Breakfast sammies

Look at all that deliciousness:

red bell pepper

grape tomatoes

yellow mini sweet pepper

red onion

red cabbage

cucumbers

carrots

celery

This is Crunch Heaven

Oh wait...forgot the fresh chopped spinach!  I threw in 1 oz. of sliced black olives, too.

Ahh....that's better.  One little problem...running out of room in the bowl to put in the pasta!  Danica's recipe called for 8 oz. of mini shell pasta.  I used 6 oz. just to cut down on the calories a bit.  But then I added 1.5 Tbsp of bacon bits...because everything tastes better with bacon. :)

The sauce for her recipe calls for 1/2 c. lite mayo, which I used, but I used more Dijon Mustard and red wine vinegar that it called for to give it that extra twang to go with my crunch.  There's also some garlic and dill weed.  I also tossed in 1/3 packet of Hidden Valley Ranch dressing packet to give it more ranch flavor w/o using the bottled dressing.  And a dash of salt and pepper to finish it off.

Our buddy Kevin came over for dinner and he likes veggies like I do.  He said this was delicious.  I think I caught him licking his plate.

Here's my dinner plate...grilled chicken breast, grilled asparagus and crunchy veggie pasta salad.

I'm going to make that Paleo sweet potato and sausage breakfast casserole soon that I've been seeing around...maybe tomorrow morning!!  I'll post pics of it when I do.  :)

A Better Day

Yesterday was shaky but I'm happy to report that my calories came in at 1430!  I was nervous and feeling disconcerted all day yesterday due to the binge the day before.  I really thought I had moved past that behavior and the fact that I didn't had me not trusting myself at all. 

One of my long-time readers commented that she wasn't really sure it was a binge...she noted I had grape tomatoes, an orange, and actually counted out 1 svg. of Pop Chips.  I will admit that with past binges, the actual food I ate was a lot worse/junky, and even a higher volume.  But to me....it was the behavior and the feelings I had that drove the eating.  That's what defined the binge for me.  The frantic, out-of-control feelings with life and shoving down the food for some kind of temporary relief or distraction (although I know in my brain that it's never a solution and fixes absolutely nothing...it only makes things worse).  No matter what kind of food I ate, or how many calories it actually was really isn't it....it's the feelings driving the behavior...the behavior itself.  It was definitely a binge mentality.

This morning I wanted a scrambled egg sandwich for breakfast...but have held off on that and haven't eaten anything yet.  I do this every day....obsess over what I should and shouldn't eat.  Try to figure out how to spread my calories out over the day.  I'm diabetic, so I always have to keep a close eye on the carb intake.  2 slices of sourdough bread is 240 calories.  Add in a couple of eggs and swipe of mayo and the calories are a little hefty.  I've been trying to make breakfast my smallest calorie intake, in case I get stupid after dinner and want to snack.  Most mornings I'll have a couple of cheesesticks (120 cals) or 2 boiled eggs (150 cals).

Yesterday when I got home from work, I had only consumed 630 cals throughout the day.  That left me 870 for dinner and whatever else.  We made grilled "pita" pizzas....but I didn't have any pita bread.  We used some round whole wheat flatbread that I bought last weekend.  They're 260 cals each.  I put a little sauce (1/4 c. is 30 cals...I used less than that), a sprinkling of cheese (1/8 c.), turkey pepperoni.  I would have normally put onions, bell peppers and mushrooms on it, but didn't have any in the frig.

A couple of hours later, I wanted to eat again.  So I made a big ass spinach salad with 3 c. of fresh spinach, 1 tbsp. of bacon bits, tomato and cucumber with 2 tbsp. of Italian dressing (110 cals).  Then I found some grilled chicken left in the frig from Sunday's dinner so I chopped up 5 oz. on top of my salad for 150 cals.  The salad was delish and perfect.

And are you ready for this?  Dwayne was watching me make the salad and he said, "I think I'll have a little spinach, too".  Ummm...WHAT???  Who are you and what have you done with my non-veggie eating boyfriend?????  Imposter!!  lol  He had a little romaine and a little spinach with a splash of Italian.  I asked if he wanted me to put cukes and tomatoes on it and he said no.  I certainly didn't want to push things so I just let him eat his little half bowl of greens.  (He said that fresh spinach just tastes like lettuce to him).  I know.  I'm still floored this morning just thinking about it.

A friend came over last night and we played a game of Scrabble.  I did NOT provide the guys with a bowl of chips like I normally do...and guess what...nobody died.  At 11pm the food thoughts showed up again and I said HELL NO and put myself to bed, ending the calories at 1430 for the day.  I only drank 64 oz. of water though, which is not nearly enough.  I need to be doubling that, and will work on it today.

Dwayne, Scarlette and I are taking a short wknd trip up to Helen, GA.  It's a little touristy place up in the North Georgia mountains, made to look like a German town.  Dwayne and I both agreed we need a change of scenery and a distraction from every day life.  We found a cheap room for $60/nite and are driving up Sat morn and coming back Sun afternoon.  I'm looking forward to it. 

I'm feeling better today....I hope you're all feeling good, too.  Make it a great day, friends. :)

A Binge Two Years Later

I binged yesterday.  OMG I really don't want to write this post...I really don't.  I know it's been at least 2 years since I've had a binge, and maybe even longer.  I really thought I had that behavior beat.  I was wrong. 

I believe there's a difference in bingeing and overeating.  I associate bingeing with frantic, out of control feelings.  That's definitely what was going on yesterday....definitely.

I posted yesterday that I had just had a crappy week.  I guess everything came to a head yesterday when I went in to the ofc and asked my boss for more hours.  I told him I didn't necessarily need 40 hrs (I knew that was impossible), but maybe 30?  He told me no.  He said we're just not busy enough at the moment to justify it.  We're pretty much past the last couple of tornadoes we had at the beginning of March, so we're back to being to slow again to warrant extra hours.  He did say that storm season is right around the corner (April), and when that happens, I'm welcome to work all the overtime I want.  He also said if we have a good year (terrible to say, but that means lots of nasty thunderstorms/tornadoes/destruction), then he'll be happy to bump my hours back up again.

This is all great and wonderful, but doesn't help me at the moment.  I really didn't want to have to go home and tell Dwayne that Scott denied me the hours.  After a week's worth of arguments and hurt feelings on this subject, I just couldn't take the pressure anymore.  I ate all day yesterday, frantically...every hour or so.  Way too much food.  I ate the grilled chicken and veggies I took for lunch...and then an entire container of grape tomatoes, a serving of Pop Chips (yes, I counted out 1 svg...it's 23 chips), then I ate an orange....then it was Mary's birthday, so the marketing girl brought in a cake.  I had a tiny slice to be polite.....then ate another small slice around 4:30p.

Alongside all of the Dwayne/job stress...I had another thing going on yesterday.  I have a friend in Fl, I've known him since high school and we're still in touch.  He has colon cancer....but he also fears he has Huntington's Disease.  His father had it and there's a 50/50 chance it can be passed to the child.  He's certain he has the symptoms.  So he made the decision to test for Huntington's but not do anything about the colon cancer until he knows about the other.  If he has Huntington's, an incurable disease that eats away at your brain until you don't know who you are and what you're doing.....then he's going to let the colon cancer take his life.  He's known about the colon cancer since December.  It took 3 months to get the appt to test for the Huntington's....which was yesterday. 

I've been dealing with this for months now.  What do you do when someone tells you how they plan to die?  Not treat the cancer in case you have something worse?  How do you process it when a lifetime friend who is only 41 yrs old tells you how they're choosing to die and leave your life? 

We texted all thru the day...he was sick to his stomach from the stress of having the test done at 3:30p.  I told him it's just having blood drawn....he won't get the results today, so chill out...this was the easy part.  He said he'd let me know after it was over how long it will take to get the results.  We were hoping a week or so.  Well, right before 5pm, he texted me and said "Call me as soon as you leave work".

Shit.  Was I wrong?  Is it possible he got the results immediately?  What was he about to tell me?  Were we fixing to talk about his death?  I couldn't handle it....I left work, knew I was going to pass a McDonald's, and went thru the drive thru....frantic doesn't even begin to describe it.  I ordered a fish sandwich...but wait!  They had a double fish sandwich on special....give me one of those.  Fries and a drink?  No.  And don't ask me why I turned those down after I'd already ingested so much food that day.  Who knows.

Driving down the road, eat the sandwich, time to call him.  He tells me they don't draw the blood there, he has to go to a lab company....and they close at 3:30pm.  So no blood test til the next day.  But he did find out how soon the results will come back.....2 to 3 MONTHS.  OMG.  Are you serious????  We have to go ANOTHER 2-3 months to find out????  Sp I ask if he's going to stick with his plan of not treating the cancer until he finds out the results on the Huntington's?  He said he doesn't know...he has to think about it....that's a long time to wait.  So I still have total uncertainty on the situation.

I get home, go to the frig, and shove a cheesestick in my mouth.  Now I have to calm down the eating some because I've never binged in front of Dwayne.  He grilled 2 NY strip steaks, and I made a salad (he actually let me put tiny bits of an English seedless cucumber and diced tomatoes in his salad...with romaine and spinach...I couldn't believe it!).  I made a small can of those pop biscuits, which I usually don't eat because they're not real biscuits.  Well...I ate 2 of them.

After dinner I asked Dwayne if he wanted to go for a walk around the neighborhood with me and Scarlette, and he said sure (shocked me again!).  I walked at the park on Sat for 45 mins by myself, and walked 2 loops around my neighborhood on Sunday, which took 26 mins.  We only did 1 lap last night, but hey! I got him off the couch!!  And don't ask me why I bothered....who exercises during a binge???  I've never claimed to be normal.

I had the conversation about no extra hours at work....he said ok...we'll see what storm season brings..but things were still pensive.  11pm came and I ate again...we split a frozen pizza.  He didn't realize this was part of a binge, because he always eats at this time...it's his 3rd meal of the day, and I was joining in ( I had stopped this behavior a couple wks ago).

Apparently all of last week's stress and yesterday's shame over the bingeing (and there was PLENTY of shame, even during the process) all manifested into some really horrible dreams.  I woke up this morning bawling my eyes out.  Such a weird ass dream....with horrible feelings/emotions.  Embarassment, humiliation, shame, heartbreak, stresss, fear...it really ran the gamut.

I'm one of those people who can remember every detail of a dream even a week later.  It stays with me.  I'm heavy-hearted today...I wish I could bleach my brain and forget about the dreams.  I wish I could forget about the binge and just MOVE FORWARD.  It bothers me that I thought I was way past bingeing behavior...and clearly wasn't.  I think what bothers me most is I don't know how to forgive myself....not just for this, but for anything in life.  People talk about it...but I don't understand it.

I rememeber a line in a movie once that is seered in my brain..."Everyone knows that the only person in the world you can't forgive...is yourself."  I remember thinking years back when I heard it, how very true it was for me.  Maybe not for others, but for me. 

Obviously....I want to get this turned around. I want to shake off the bad feelings, get over it, and move forward for the weight loss if for nothing else.  I'm already up 1.4 lbs for the first time since joining Chris' 100 day challenge.  I want to turn it around RIGHT NOW.  I know I'm in a bad spot and this could very easily go the other way.  I'm acutely aware of being on a fence and facing the wrong direction.  I'm thinking about it, dwelling on it, worried....looking for a way to change my attitude, lose the bad feelings, forget the dreams, and make the right choices today.  It's nearly 11am and I haven't eaten breakfast yet because I was scared to...how sad is that?  Good grief I need to get a grip.

And there's more.  If I'm going to do a vomit post, I might as well get it ALL out in one sweep.

Along with this is the ever-present PCOS problem with the aching ovaries, the constant acne breakouts on my face, the hair falling out of my head every day.  When I go for a brisk walk (because exercise is good for you!), it just hurts.  My stomach is so big and low-hanging, it jostles my ovaries terribly.  It truly feels like I'm stepping on them and squishing them into the pavement every time I take a step.  I came home Saturday after my walk and my hips hurt so bad I felt like I was 80 years old...and I had shin splints in both shins.  Really????  I'm 39 yrs. old.  I want to lose 60 more lbs.  Am I really so fat, old and decrepid that a stupid 45 min walk should make me feel like I just climbed a mountain??  I was still so friggin' sore on Sunday that I didn't want to go out for another walk.  But I did a couple of laps around the neighborhood and man, did it hurt.

Ok, I'm done now.  I've tried very hard since starting this 2nd blog not to fill it with negative posts, so I apologize for this one.  I wish every day was full of rainbows and butterflies and I was just sailing down the scale pain-free.  Um....yeah.  Well...this is where I'm at right now.  I'm going to try my damndest to turn it all around today and make it a good eating day, with some walking this evening.  I'm hoping my next post is bright and sunshiny.  Thanks to all of you for listening.